So much to worry about.....

I am the mother of a strong-willed child. I find it completely exhausting to be in a constant confrontation of wills. Ultimately, neither one means the other any harm. She doesn't mean to annoy me and I don't mean to irritate her, but that is just how it usually shakes out. Having a strong-willed child is a perplexing ingredient in our family life. You never know when "that " moment is going to hit, when everything blows up faster than a stick of dynamite with an extremely short wick, or where you may be when it happens. I am not talking about stubbornness, most kids have moments of testing their parents, but rather a prewired DNA trait or personality characteristic that seems to just be a part of who they are. I find it hard to find a balance between guiding and inspiring versus demanding and disciplining. I think both are needed, but I wonder in what proportion? Hum, this seems to be one of life's parenting mysteries...Am I getting this right or should I just schedule a therapy session, or two, for her now?
I actually admire adults who are strong-willed and I believe that it will serve my little Shannon well in her later years as a teenager and an adult, if I can channel her energy in the right direction. I am just wondering how to direct her, without breaking her spirit?!
Being a parent is, by far, the most challenging aspect of my life. I don't consider myself to be someone who worries about many things. I have learned that there are too many things in life that I have NO control over and so why stress about it. While this generally serves my well, my kids are a different story. I worry about it all. How much freedom should I give them and at what age and stage of life? How hard do I push the consuming of those "yucky" green vegetables? How many extracurricular activities should I encourage them to participate in? Are their clothes modest? Are they getting enough sleep? Do they have friends? Do they use manners when I am not around reminding them? Do they have any ticks on them? We found another tick on Erin this morning! Are they brushing the teeth and scrubbing their pits? Come on, like you don't make your kids clean their pits! Are they reading on grade level? Can they, and will they, be able to call 911 if they need to? Do they understand "stranger danger"? You can get the picture from here, right? You could worry yourself to death! Maybe, at the end of the day, I will be the one who needs therapy!